Leadership Travels

Challenge 1

Perhaps I may have been ambitious here, particularly with the statement “….without breaking into a cold sweat”

I found this be an exceedingly difficult self-challenge, one which was accompanied by considerable negative self-talk. I almost chickened out and went for the email approach but made myself call her. It took about 15 mins of psychologically preparing myself to even dial the number. The first time I rang she didn’t answer and I can’t believe the immense relief that accompanied the putting down of the telephone.

The second time that I called her she answered. I managed a civil conversation etc and communicated what was required in a pleasant manner [or at least I thought so]. By the time I finished the call, my face was red and burning and I was sweating up a storm.

Interestingly with this particular instant the self-talk was not just inside my head, I was articulating my apprehension verbally to a couple of colleagues sitting near me.

I have decided a strategy for next time I am required to call her. I am going to document all of the -ive thought patterns around the scenario and write +ive scenarios next to them and prime myself with those for 15 minutes before hand if I have to.

The irony of all of this – she is perfectly polite on the phone.  I have worked myself into a twisted state in the last 3.4 years over not a lot really.  If I can deal with the V-C, D-VC’s and the rest of the Executive without batting an eyelid, there shouldn’t really be a problem here.

Challenge 2

Ummm.  While I have not keep a log in the last week, I was a lot more conscious of the fact that I was generating -ive self-talk.  This self-talk was actually stronger outside the workplace than inside the workplace.

I wonder if this is like being an alcoholic or something?  Acknowledging and defining you have an ‘issue’ and what that ‘issue’ actually is.

Will keep working on this one.  I suspect this is going to be one of the most difficult personal challenges in this entire program.

Hmm doing reading for this weeks class on Communication and Witholds.

Reading about the value of listening skills.   Reference to the better the decision maker the better the listening skills.  Given my worst learning style was auditory does this automatically link to poorer listening skills? Guessing this then makes it harder at the get go to develop my listening skills.  Blerk.

Fascinating to look at this. Athletes use this to improve/optimise their performance in competition. I remember when I was swimming competitively, I would repeat the time I wanted over and over in my head days before a race. More often than not I nailed it or did even better.

Where does it come from then? The negativity?

Why then, as I have transitioned from a teenager to adult hood has my self-talk gone from generally positive self-affirmations to more negative ones [or is that just a perception - maybe they were always crap? And is that one there? Aaarrrrgh]? Have there been experiences that have influenced this at a deeper level? I know the answer to this. A big yes, and I know exactly what they are – not entirely sure I really want to discuss this as it still really makes me uncomfortable. I don’t really talk about this with anyone. Very much a part of the Facade quadrant from the Johari Window mentioned above.

I think I am faced with a super challenge ahead in reprogramming the automatic negative self-talk that I appear to be conditioned with.

Maybe if I fleshed out actually outed some of the formative experiences early in life and named them ie gave them shape and form, this would help to actually understand some of the root conditioning that I have imposed upon my unconscious mind? I know it still affects me significantly in multiple facets of my life.

A positive anecdote

My Director is on ARL and I am currently acting in my bosses position while she is away. My acting Director had to sign a number of documents to transfer delegations to me as well as HDA. He was viewing everything thoroughly and I was gettign impatient with him [the normal Director is used to these docs now and just signs them]. When the A/Director came to the HDA form he asked “so how much are we paying you for this? Oh thats how much!” I then said “I am worth that” [happy there - articulated a positive comment about myself], and he said “yes, every cent and more”. It actually made me feel really good about myself and I have ruminated upon that a bit in the last couple of days. Interesting that I put something positive out there and got something positive back.

The not so pleasant experience

We have a new Vice-Chancellor. But we have the same Executive Assistant (EA) for him as we had for the last V-C. This woman scares the absolute crapola out of me. When I started at this organisation 3.5 years ago, you go through obviously orientation and induction. But it is the cultural induction that can actually really set your impressions of a place. I was told that the EA was a “dragon” “stickler for detail” “grammar nazi” “guard dog” “scary”. Maybe its those comments that embed somewhere into the subconscious and have programmed me for how I view interactions with this person. Trepidation is not even close.

I had an ‘incident’ yesterday at work that sort of involved this person. Maybe its bigger in my head than it actually was. I went through this in class tonight with my peer mentor, but am feeling the need to follow this through to a conclusion and action plan of some sort.

I discussed with my line manager on Tuesday some wording changes to a formal email that was to go out from the V-C to the uni’s most senior staff. We both had some reservations about the changes and discussed this at length. The email was meant to be sent from the V-C on Monday morning and it still had not been sent on Wed morning. I rang the EA to ask [nicely] if the email had been sent [knowing full well it hadn't]. a) it turned out that it hadn’t – a lack of clarity of instruction between us and the V-C. b) she wanted me to foward everything back through to her, including the document that had the V-C’s edits in it. I asked her to check the edits and make sure she was happy with them, however did not articulate the exact concerns that my line manager and I had about the wording.

When my manager asked me about the email and the wording Wed night and if I had addressed it with the EA, I said I had not bought that issue up exactly, but I had asked her to check the edits. I could here the tone, of….hmmm not sure, reservation? concern? annoyance? in my managers voice. At this point the little voice in the head was going full throttle with negative comments.

Touching base today with the manger, there has been no apparent fallout from the wording that went out. Nice to know that the world has not come to an end. Why did I feel so bad? All those key faulty thinking issues discussed in class tonight. In particular:

• Overgeneralisation [both with EA and Manager]
• Should/Must thinking [berating self that I should have done that]
• Catastrophising [OMG - the world is going to end, the V-C will be shat when his ED's jump up and down then my boss will be in the shit...etc]
• Self-blaming [oh i am such an idiot. How stupid can I be?]

Today I mentioned that we should contact the EA and give her the heads up about an email coming out on Monday that needs to come from the V-C. My manager asked me to do it. I just about shat myself. Kept it together though. Initially I thought I would do it via email, as this is less….confrontational [well to me anyway]. After this class tonight, I think I need to actually call her and do a follow-up email. I don’t even know what this woman looks like – she is just a voice and email. How can I build a working relationship with her? I can with others in the org, but obviously as a strategy it does not work for this EA. If I can succeed at least in being able to communicate with her and not turn into a quivering heap, that is a success? And am I even really talking about self-talk here and transitioned to another issue? That of confrontation and perception of conflict?

I received an email the other day from her. After reading it the self-talk was immediately “why do I always have problems with this woman?” “why does she always make me feel like that?”. I should be CHOOSING how I feel and really, no one else can make me feel anything [in theory - practice is more of an issue I suspect].

Personal Challenge #1

Ringing her and getting what I need in a +ive manner without breaking into a cold sweat!

Personal Challenge #2

Going to keep a log on this blog [or somewhere] on self-talk and monitor it. Will reflect upon other potential +ive responses to the same situation

Had a really interesting class tonight on Emotional Intelligence and Self-Talk. Have heard the EI propaganda a number of times over the years – Goleman‘s pop culture, however the way we looked at it tonight I found incredibly interesting and useful.

Amygdala

In the first week of class we discussed the function of the brain, particularly the amygdala in the limbic system. We went through this again, and as someone with a science background, I love the rationalisation of where the primal emotions are coming from. For me it really contextualises and frames the whole concept of EI.

Emotional Intelligence

I have had a copy of Goleman’s Emotional Intelligence for years, and Rick is right. Boring as batshit. I read fast and I read a lot and pretty much finish everything I read. And probably am only a tenth of the way through this book and just can’t bring myself to read any further. However I think that it might be worth while putting my hands on his “Working with Emotional Intelligence” again as well as “The New Leaders“. I used the Working one last year in OB for an assignment and I found it really useful. Think there maybe some def applications to the work being done on this course.

The whole concept of recognising emotions in others is fine I guess, and for the most part I am fairly tuned (I think) to emotional responses in others. However, if I choose to not acknowledge that, does that make me less emotionally intelligent? Isn’t playing to someone else’s emotions [at times] encouraging their inability to develop emotionally? Sure, there are times when you must/need to acknowledge them, but surely not all the time? And does this make me more of a T person (a la Myers-Briggs) than my profile may indicate?

Johari Window

I was reading a bit last night about Johari’s Window and essentially this entire program is about increasing the amount we know about ourselves and sharing it with others. This means increasing the Arena window and decreasing the size of my blind spots and unknown window. I think the Facade bit for me will be the greatest challenge, even compared to the unknown.

I have read the gamut of literature for tomorrow nights class on learning styles and organisational learning as well as having completed a number of inventories.

Learning Styles Questionnaire (LSQ)

The Mumford and Honey learning styles questionnaire (LSQ) is one that I have had to use in a previous class at uni.  Interestingly I seem to have a fairly even spread of learning styles with only four points of difference between my most preferred and least preferred mode of learning.  Mumford (1995), suggests however that the Reflector and Activist preferences should almost be at opposite ends of the spectrum i.e. one would not expect a learner whose preference is a hands on approach, to score highly in the reflection area.  It sounds like I am somewhat unusual? All of these four paradigms sit comfortably with me, even the role of Reflector.  I actually actively blog and am part of a global network of practitioners who actively engage in reflective learning practices amongst each other.

VARK

The data generated by the LSQ in congruent with the results generated from the VARK questionnaire.  VARK results look at the impact of visual, aural, kinaesthetic and reading and writing on learning.  The results generated are similar to those from the Myers-Briggs Type Inventory.  There were no surprises here for me in the results as I am an appalling auditory/aural learner and struggled with traditional university teaching methodologies when completing my undergraduate and even previous post-graduate qualifications.  I am highly visual and like a lot of imagery and colour in my representation of ideas/thoughts/concepts and so forth.  I can’t give directions without drawing a map!  I read in pictures, I think in pictures and I dream in colour pictures.  I think that on the whole, VARK shows a reasonably well rounded set of learning preferences and I suspect that the challenge of improving my aural learning style would be indeed significant.  I will have to compare the data from all of my tests with that of my peer coach as will also influence how we conduct our coaching relationship to maximise the personal gain and development for both of us.

**Interestingly, as I sit here, I am already thinking about my staff and perhaps having them work through some of these questionnaires to a) gain a greater understanding of their learning preferences and b) using this as a basis for working out professional development arising out of their MPS**

The activist and kinesthetic I have found to be the natural preference that I seek when I am being continually “yapped” at (seriously, at times, all I hear is blah blah blah).  If it involves some form of technical training, and there is an hour of explaining before I am allowed to try what ever it happens to be, I am at screaming point and start getting quite fidgety and almost anxious.  God knows how I got through my previous university experiences.

Index of Learning Styles

The final of the three questionnaires was using the Felder-Silverman model referred to as the Index of Learning Styles or ILS.  The first line represents the scale between active and reflective learners, with my preference apparently to the more active than reflective side.  This parallels the data from the LSQ although the LSQ did not have a large variance between the two.  I have a higher preference for sensing than intuiting i.e. I tend to learn better with cold hard facts, have patience with details, hands on approach, and am practical.  While I agree with this, I would also suggest I have a reasonable degree of comfort with intuitive learning i.e. liking to discover possibilities and relationships, grasping new concepts and am innovative (well i think so ).

Obvious a strong preference for visual over verbal (no surprises there) – say no more.  The fourth preference is somewhat different compared to the LSQ and VARK.  It represents Sequential Learners versus Global Learners.  Sequential learners prefer to learn with a linear progression of information, with logical linkages.  Global learners can learn with big leaps, randomly absorb material with out any apparent connection or direction and then all of a sudden actually see the picture/point etc.  The implications of these types of learners are that sequential learners may still be able to follow a logical stepwise progression and not necessarily “get it”, while preferentially strong globals may not actually be able to  put the pieces of the puzzle together until they have the big picture.  Given my score is somewhat in the middle of the spectrum, with a mild skew towards global, this would indicate that I am equally as happy with stepwise learning as grasping the big picture – although the big picture may assist cognitive processing of the component parts.                                                                                                                                                                         http://www.flickr.com/photos/95272747@N00/

Implications for my leadership development then?

 From the above results, any development of my leadership and managerial capabilities will need to be predominantly developed around:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

• Visuals – eg drawings, pictures, maps, mindmaps , flowcharts, symbols, highlighting text when reading, videos.  Any form of visual stimulus.
• Hands on approach to learning – get the theory down then apply it to an appropriate concept in the workplace
• Reflect on the learnings from this action based approach (hell – sounds like what I am doing now right?)

Stay clear from – auditory learning! ack! Rick, please don’t yap at us too much!

References 

Mumford, A. 1995. Putting learning styles to work: An integrated approach. Industrial and Commercial Training 27 (8): 28-35.

http://www4.ncsu.edu/unity/lockers/users/f/felder/public/ILSdir/styles.htm

http://www.vark-learn.com/english/index.asp

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My peer coach is currently on holidays, so I thought I would get the ball rolling.  I completed my 117 question Competing Values Framework and had it mapped to the requisite diagram.  Of course the relevant CVF questionnaire still has to go to my line manager and my peers for their answers and mapping before I get the total picture, but it is still a good indication of developmental areas.

Looking at this there are some obvious areas of personal development particularly against the roles of Faciliator [conflict management, participative decision making and team building] and Coordinator [designing work, managing across functions, delegating effectively and designing and organising].  There are also obvious gaps in the areas of the Broker role [building a power base and negotiating agreement], which I find of particular concern.

If these areas are also reflected in the feedback from my line manager and peers, I would suspect that these will be the areas worked on specifically in the next three months.

If I had asked myself before this questionnaire what areas I believed needed work, I would have agreed with the Facilitator role, however I am mildly surprised the degree to which the Coordinator role is lacking.

I find the performance management system at my organisation to be useful.  This information will be invaluable in assisting both myself and my line manager in developing and monitoring MPS plans in the future.